The Strangers (2008)

I've been meaning to review this one ever since I saw it in theaters. Well, for the sake of not having one of the TWILIGHT the first blog you see when you come to my blog, I felt the need to review this.

This film was probably one of the most tense movies I've seen in a long time. I got a little freaked out by it and I have to say that I thought it was honestly one of the best horror-esque movies I've seen in years. I got sick of the same stuff every time I would watch a horror film, but this movie made me remember why I loved them so much. And it was perfect. I honestly thought this movie did everything right, for once because you never see that anymore.

It really worked on the basic fear that any human being has. Being a lone in the house, and things going bump in the night. Being mentally fucked with beyond belief, with no rhyme or reason. Emotions run high, chills up and down your spine, you're helpless, as the fear takes over. This film is dangerous and scary. I can't imagine why a horror fan wouldn't dig this one.

Bryan Bertino both wrote and directed this flick, and he did an amazing job at that. He is great with his framing, shots, as well as overall pacing when it comes to setting up a scare, as well as the execution of it. The relationship between Kristen and James (Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman) was great. Their on screen chemistry worked very well.

A planned sequel is in the works. I was originally a little hesitant about it once I read about it, but as I looked more into it, I say 'bring it on,' because I cannot wait to see what the 'Strangers' have in store for us next time.

More Sparkly Shit: New Moon (2009)

Well, I brought this upon myself. I decided to grin and bear the consequences I bestowed upon myself...by watching TWILIGHT yesterday, and NEW MOON today. And boy, was it quite the experience. And I don't mean that positively in any way. If you read my TWILIGHT review, you'll know exactly what I am talking about.

Now, my review for NEW MOON is a bit different than how I previously reviewed TWILIGHT. This is going to be in bulletin form, because as I watched it, I wrote down any and all thoughts that were popping into my head during that time. Now, don't cancel out the amount of anger I bestowed upon the first installment, as that was still readily in full force while watching this installment as well.

- Dating a 109 year old man. Yes, it is gross. Sagtastic balls, all wrinkly. Less sparkles!

- Jacob is "filling out?" Yep, butt injections and terrible hair. I'm sure he'd get along great with soap dropping baseball players.

- Edwards choice of romantic words are terrible. He's still an asshole, coated over by goofy smiles and constipated expressions.

- All of the actors seem like they're really tired, or don't want to be there. As if they're simply there for the check. The only actor that I feel as if really cares about ANY of this is by Billy Burke (playing Bella's dad.)

-Paper cut scene: HILARIOUS.

- Oh no, are they breaking up? Good. Maybe she'll get some fucking brains in her skull. Oh wait, this is TWILIGHT...she's dumb as shit.

-"I'm Coming." "Bella, I don't want you to come." *snicker, giggle, teehee.*

- After Edward left her in the woods, I really wanted the tree's to go all EVIL DEAD and rape the shit out of her. And for a little extra enjoyment...kill her.

- All werewolves must be half-naked Indians. It's a rule. A rule of life. How could I have forgotten this? Stupid.

- Bella must smell like total ass after sitting there for 3 months straight, over something so fucking stupid. Dumb bitch.

- Edward Ghost-Apparition? Time to bust out the Proton Packs, bitches! *Sings Ghostbusters theme.*

- So, she's a reckless little twit, now? Okay...sure. An "Adrenaline Junkie?" Save yourself some time...kill yourself.

- "Face Punch" for a movie title? Really. Must star Nicolas Cage.

- The CGI wolves in this movie look TERRIBLE.

- When the hell could werewolves hear each others thoughts? And what kind of muffins are they eating? They better be chocolate chip.

- Bella really seems to have a thing for controlling, maniacal, self absorbed little shits. What's next? A mongoloid brought back from the dead via a mad scientist?

- Dakota Fanning. Yep. That's all I have to say about that.

- The only positives of the past two films have been the character of Alice (played by Ashley Greene). So perky, cute, yet darkly mysterious. Everything else = shit.